Now that the “off season” in high school sports is officially here (I’ll fill you in later) I would like to throw my hat in the political ring. Yes, I know my past, coming of age during the flower child era, might be something with which we’ll have to contend but I’m sure it can get a positive spin from a highly creative public relations guru. Did I hear someone say “hold on there shutterbug, the primaries are all but over and we have definite certified candidates?” Well, listen up, I hadn’t ever heard of “super delegates” until recently, much less a little known select group called “super secret sane delegates” I found through diligent research. I still got a shot, especially if I can get you, my peeps, to get the word out there.

My platform is based on common sense. If you are on welfare and healthy, cheer up because you’re going to work! My administration likes working people. You can record “The Price is Right” and watch it after work. Got too many kids to work? No problem, we’ll get you reasonable daycare, your kids need to see you with a job. “What about the energy crises, cameraman?” I hear you politely ask under your breath. Nuclear power plants. Takes 2 years to build one. We’ve been using nuclear energy on submarines for over 50 years and not one life lost and millions and millions of gallons of fossil fuel saved. Most of the civilized world is going in that direction, even France! We will build new refineries and responsibly poke new holes wherever common sense allows. “Tree huggers” will have the opportunity to buy higher priced gas from existing suppliers. All the bills proposed in Congress will “stand-alone”. No more “pork barrel” politics. I would think most bills could then be condensed to a page or two of plain English. Did I just say English? Yep, our national language will be once again be English. I will more than welcome anyone who wants to come to our country legally, and we’ll streamline the process, but you will need to learn our language as we would if we moved to your country. More to come.

For the rest of this story, read this week's Cadiz Record.