Too old, too fast!
Aug 04, 2004 | 0 0 comments | 1 1 recommendations | email to a friend | print
This week the wife has been going over our medical bills that seem to roll in faster than paychecks. For all but the past couple of years we visited a doctor to have our tonsils removed when we were a small lad and then to have a shoulder fixed with we fell out of a tree on a deer hunt.

Other than that we’ve fared pretty well in the health field.

On those occasions you made an appointment with a doctor and he took care of everything. He looked at our tonsils, said they needed to come out, did the procedure and then made home visits to make sure everything was working right.

My, oh, my, how things have changed.

As the wife was going over the bills, she would mention that we owed Dr. Hough some money.

Who? We asked.

Dr. Hough came the answer.

We don’t know a Dr. Hough. Why do we owe him money?

Because it says here he treated you.

Treated us for what?

Don’t know, but that was the same date as this bill from Dr. Hane.

Who?

Dr. Hane, she repeats.

So, who the heck is Dr. Hane?

Don’t know, but that was the same date as this bill from Dr. Reed.

Dr. Reed, now there’s one we know. She’s the one who poked something the size of a garden hose in our body cavities until the lights met somewhere in the middle.

A little research found that one of the doctors – we couldn’t identify if they were to walk into the living room – took an xray. The other was the guy who made sure we were asleep during the procedure. (We can’t identify him, either . . . but we sure appreciate his work!)

To make the circle complete was a bill from our regular doctor for the original office visit that resulted in his recommending we see these other doctors. In other words, we had to pay him for sending us to someone else so they could send us a bill also.

In the long run, however, we are grateful that we have found a doctor that will take care of us and make sure that we stay in good health.

But we sure would feel better if we could get a Christmas card from these folks we haven’t met but send checks to!

*****

We’re not real sure what they are, but you can’t have them until you get into the middle school. Elementary school students – at least those who attend Trigg Elementary – have been told they are not to bring them to school.

Don’t know what the penalty might be, but there is was in plain print among the school supplies: No trapper keepers.

They’re also not allowed to bring mechanical pencils. No pens. No backpacks with wheels. And no large size supply boxes.

Come on teachers. With all the stuff the kids have to bring to school there are some things that don’t seem to make sense.

For example, if a child has to have all the supplies listed, surly they could be allowed to have a big enough box to put the stuff in. And what about the backpack on wheels? We’ve seen elementary children so loaded down with stuff in their backpacks (apparently because they can’t have a large supply box) they walk as though they are headed into gale wind forces.

We can understand the mechanical pencils – they won’t be needing them until they take a mechanical drawing class, well, if they still teach mechanical drawing. We also understand the no pen rule. Youngsters at that age tend to smear the ink when they write with a pen. Sorta like editors do when they write something.

Apparently we didn’t have to worry about trapper keepers when we were in school. Shucks, we bet there weren’t any such things as trapper keepers when we went to school.

But then again, we didn’t have vending machines, either.

Vyron Mitchell is editor and general manager of The Cadiz Record. He can be reached at vmitchell@cadizrecord.com. And he would like to know what the heck a trapper keeper is used for.
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